Lawlady's Divorce Blog

Journal Question for the Night

It feels delicious to be back writing.  I forgot who I was for, oh, say 1.5 years when I wasn't writing.

Have you ever done that?  Sort of left yourself by the side of the road while you headed off to try some other way of being?  It's nice for a while to try being something else.  The thrill of  new is refreshing.  But it's so nice to come home to where you belong. 

Finding the right niche in life is a balancing act.  That's why I like the Tao so much.  It's a middle approach. You can have the new, with the comfort of some of the old as well. 

If I was your writing teacher, I'd have you write your nightly journal entry on the subject "home turf."   Where do you slip into that comfort zone?  How can we keep you there more often?  What is your "home turf?"

American's Kick the Fat Habit and Spur Other Countries On... World Improved.

I'm still hung up about my fat neck at my recent photo shoot.  I was supposed to be on a diet and putting fitness and health at the top of my to-do list this year.  Had I stuck with the program, my photoshoot would have been a celebration of 4 months of hard work. Instead it was motivational:
Get Thee Back to Weight Watchers Honey!

With the Obama presidency and its focus on pulling our country out of trouble,  I'd love a national campaign promoting all of us "doing the hardest tasks" together.  Rather like the military, just different because we live in different homes.  If I knew you were hauling your butt out of bed early to study for your GMAT, or you were giving yourself hives restraining your viper-tongue and breaking your criticism habit, I might have more discipline with the chocolate bars and lunches out. 

They say that if everyone is in a similar circumstance, people feel happier.  I'd love a national campaign for self-improvement.  You all would remind me to try harder, run more, eat less, and do it with joy in my heart.  My hard work would spur you on. 

Wouldn't it be great?  Bill Boards, internet banner ads, 15 second radio bursts, all proclaiming:  America We Suck.  Get Our Ass in Gear and Improve Ourselves! 

I'd like to see the look on the face of the middle-east when the reality wave hits:  "You can't call us Fat Americans anymore!!"  Maybe our good progress might stir another country to improve something dislikeable about themselves.

When I speak about "fat" I'm speaking figuratively.  You might not have a problem with fat, but you've got something else to work on.  You have your version of fat.   

I apologize in advance to anyone who feels that I am being too harsh against fat people.  It isn't my intention to offend.   But really, my face would look MUCH better without this neck action.  

Old-fashioned Mastery

I had an exceptional photography experience with Lance Lusignan of Xavier Imaging.  I posted a call for photographers at 10 am. I wanted someone to come by my office at 5:00 and, for $40, take my headshot.  He showed up with a couple bags of camera equipment and lights, and took 300 pictures. 

As I told him, if it wasn't for my double chin and lumpy body, these would be amazing fashion shots-  they were lit so well.  

I upped his rate to $100, he was so professional. 

I've been thinking about "mastery" a lot lately.  For many years we heard the phrase "do what you love and the money will follow."  Many people I know dedicated their lives to turning their hobby turn into a money-maker only to ditch the concept later as unworkable. 

I think there is a slight variation to this theme:  Do exceptional work and the money will follow.  Now typically, if you love something you'll do great work, but that isn't always true.  Many people's version of "doing what you love" is finding some slothful lifestyle that feels great.  Doing what they love might include bouncing from experience to experience ensuring they  stay sort of mediocre at everything. 

Mastery is hanging in there until you get really good.   It's  making a good solid effort to put in a fabulous performance, even if all you are doing is a fast pick up job for $40- well below your normal rate.  

In our "changing" (read, retreating) economy, we are pushed to peer into the mirror and realize our mediocrity and our shine.   Now more than ever it's important to perfect our performance and repeat, repeat, repeat our practices to reach proficiency and beyond. 

I suspect the world needs us to hone our talents a bit more.  As a culture, we got glitter-eyed and demanding of recognition without the interest in years of devotion to an art, craft, skill or industry. 

I think it's time we return to a focus of honing ourselves to  master level, in whatever we choose to do.

Like Lance.    

Job Hunting on Craig's List

I'm a big fan of Craig's list. I post for small jobs all the time. I learned the idea from my career counselor friend.  I want to hire someone to help me unpack boxes and organize myself.  In four hours I've had 25+ excellent candidates.

Here is the dilemma:  how do you choose from such a wellspring of good people?  Do I hire the south American attorney who can't find legal work but is also super organized?  Making a lawyer connection is probably a good thing for her.  Or, the homosexual candidate who tells me "tidiness and good taste is encoded into (his)  DNA-- being a gay man and all."   Then there are the handful of cheerful gals, eager to make the task upbeat.  And then the few women with years of professional experience in the housekeeping industry.  Don't get me started on the sweet kids who live close by and desire to do a really good job. 

I love the honesty and self-revelations by the candidates.  If you were a voyeristic type person, you might want to post job ads just to see what people are up to with their lives. 

I'm sorry I can't hire them all.  I'm sad that our world is such that so many people need work.  We've got to figure out this sustainable living model sooner rather than later.  We can have an amazing planet if we just get together and start making smart choices about our labors and reward system. 

I think I'm going with the gal that is good with the getting the gunky stuff off.   For obvious reasons.

To Look Hot or Not

I spent the day working on my closet:  organizing shirts by color, folding t-shirts and putting them all in one spot.  Monday I'm having my "style consultation."  $100 an hour to have someone come over, and tell me what body parts need camouflage, and what I  should never, ever buy again.

I've come full circle on my opinion about fashion.  I did the Farrah Fawcett hairdo in the 70s, the college sorority girl bob in the 80s, the grey suit with the bow-tied blouse in the 90s, and  the upscale hippy-wear in the holistic new millennium.   

I've shopped like a holic to decompress after a stressful day/week/month of trials, client conflicts, and bookkeeping hilarity (a subject you most definitely DO NOT want to be funny).

In this age of economizing, scaling back, and considering the environment, is it still right to dress for success? 

Will you'all think more highly of me if I stop wearing JC Penney suits?  (Yes- go ahead... refuse to hire me.  I DO wear that Worthington Petite Brand  when it goes on sale. )

Is it more Green and socially conscious to wear Goodwill?  But... will you really feel good about paying me $360 an hour if I sport greasy spots on my Target fall collection?  If I invest in a $300 perfectly proportioned blouse will I stand taller, act smarter and treat other human beings with more civility thus warranting a raise on my hourly rate?

We'll find out Monday after my consult with the trained, fashion professional.    

Hiring a Techy Person

Lawlady Inc is hiring an IT, techy person.  I posted a job ad and one of the best responses was from a 10th grader.

That's right.  A 10th grader.  His cover email kicked ass.  He even asked for feedback so he could improve his approach.  He was so charismatic and dynamic, I put him in the "no" bin. 

How can I hire such a consummate professional to program my Ipod? 

It's a scary world when the 10th graders are putting together better cover letters than the Microsoft veterans. 

Another Craig's List Reponse

Hello Sir,

 

My name is XXX, my intentions are to build a relationship of ultimate satisfaction for my clients. Let me facilitate your lawn, you will be very much pleased.  You may respond via email at XXX.  Thank you!

 

Sincerely,

XXX

Mind-Blowing Networking Event

Sometimes I get angry when I see what has happened to the legal aspects of our world.  I suppose I am no different from a scientist who despairs over how little funds are currently being designated for research and development. Or, someone knowledgeable about the prison system.  Or, the Weight Loss Counselor who is tired of schools feeding children sugary lunches. 

We all have a reason to be angry and now is the time to do something about it.  It's time for us to collectively address all that is wrong with our world.  If we each pick something to focus on, our world is going to starting turning in that upward spiral "real" soon. 

It takes our actionable anger to ingite our will and get us off the proverbial couch.   I'm inviting Biznik people to bring your righteous anger and your open mind to a "Mind Blowing Networking Event" Wednesday May 27th. Location: the lovely Puget Sound Yacht Club. 

I don't want to blow the surprise.   I'll fill you in on the details closer to the time of the event. 

Come armed to make a difference. 

Tentative Steps Back Out

I haven't  posted many blog entry over the past year or more.  For a while, I lost my career enthusiasm.  I've been at family law for 11 years, and general litigation for another 9 years on top of that. I needed a break. It seemed sort of unprofessional to sit around blogging about career ennui.  Does someone really want to hire a lethargic professional?

Yet at the same time, my skills kept deepening.  Rather like muscle that is developed on gym days even when you don't feel motivated to work out. 

In a long career, there are going to be  autumn/ winter seasons when you step back and chill.  It's nice if you can identify when you are moving through those phases so you can create an alternative structure for yourself. What is difficult is when you don't correctly identify where you are in the cycle and you just feel confused, or worse, bad about your boredom.

After I sold my office building last April,  we at Lawlady slacked a bit at a temporary interior office on Dexter. I relied on temp attorneys for a short period so I could take more time off.    Our work had a low key feel to is and I even considered selling the practice and jumping careers. 

I had several interested buyers, but in the end, the Lawlady bug bit me again.  I became reenchanted and found a whole new way to be with the business.  This time, rather than a rapid expansion, we're going to spread gently.  I'll save the details for later.  Suffice it to say.  Lawlady is going some exciting new places. 

I love that entrepreneurism  recreates itself.  You never have the same work twice.  It always morphs if you wait long enough. 

Now Lawlady Inc is headed into a new era of technological efficiency.  We're headed to something bigger and with a wider impact.  I'll keep you posted. 

I'll be slowly returning to the public view.  It's feel shy to be back.  But good shy.  I actually missed you very much.  I love you public. 

Biznik is Amazing

I remember many years ago being invited to a Biznik event.  I showed up to a dive restaurant in Ballard at 7:00 am and sat alone for an hour eating a greasy egg breakfast.  I was stood up for my first Biznik event.  They changed the date or time or something. 

I didn't go back for about two years.  And then a friend inticed me back and I slowly started becoming active on line.  They have a great website layout that's fun to use. 

Last night I attended their "Shine" event. It was an amazing event of many hundreds of entrepreneurs.   They set up 12 video stations and members were interviewed for an upcoming documentary about self-employment and being an entrepreneur.   Really, it was a miracle.  All these hundreds of gutsy, effusive professionals telling a shared story.  We speak with many voices but the tales are similar.  I'm excited to hear the unified voice.

It got me thinking that this half-breed "party-film" documentary style is a masterful film-making style.  It could easily be structured to capture other stories:   abortion,  divorce, crime, frustration with the fast, modern world.